Sunday, September 13, 2009

God's Handmade Soul

Tonight I got an email from one of my lovies, Nadine. She'd reunited with a childhood friend and shared pictures of their joyous time together. I couldn't help but think of Keysha.

Keysha and I met at a crucial time in both our lives. I was fourteen, and she was twelve. Despite our age differences, we were best friends, and it is she who stood at the altar beside me in that little Pentecostal church on April 15, 1980. We were both "seized by the power of a great afffection," as the old folks used to say about being born again. We were also magnificently filled with the Holy Spirit at the same time, the gift of tongues pouring out of our newborn souls. I told her stories, and for hours we'd be caught up in these tales I'd spin. We got to be heroines with handsome boys who loved us in my stories, and I believe in many ways those yarns kept us safe from the horrors happening outside our ghetto doors.

Of course we drew apart. We got older. We played with boys, and the years multiplied between us. The next thing I knew we were apart for a very long time, but I loved my friend. We'd share so much, and I missed her.

We've seen each other a few times since I've been writing, and the last time I saw her was the first weekend in August, just after her birthday, and before mine. She stopped by on her birthday tour. I gave her books; she gave me a word from the Lord.

I think I may have mentioned the yoga class, or maybe I talked about this miracle of trying to get to Lexington with your help. Whatever I had to report, she looked at me, her eyes full of wisdom and compassion, and Keysha told me, essentially, the worst is over.

Both of us are far heavier than we were as lithe youth, and she'd just gotten a membership to a gym. I told her how we'd be gardening in Lexington, and sharing meals. She assured me in the end I'd be a new creation, not just in my heart, but in my body. Wow. At long last.

My lovie, Erin is becoming a new creation, too, and isn't that amazing, how God shapes us in the image and likeness He always wanted us to be in. Erin's rediscovering her life and sharing the journey. I guess I'm doing the same thing here.

Don't you think it's incredible that you can begin again the simple act of being you? You can keep the best of yourself and add to it, and drop off what doesn't serve God, yourself, or anyone else. Yesterday I dreamed I lost a lot of weight. Sure, I want to literally lose weight, and I'm certain I will in time, but I had to wonder if this dream was telling me something important.

I'm losing WEIGHT, burdens, toxins to my being.

Today at Mass, in the middle of his homily, Fr. Norman (who is AMAZING by the way) asked us to sing. The song was a revamping of the Diana Ross favorite from Mahogany, "Do You Know Where You're Going To."

Do you know, where you're going to?
Do you like the things that God is showing you?
Where are you going to?
Do you know?

And then he started rapping. I don't know about you, but I like a priest who can bust a rhyme now and then. Fr. Norman asked some good questions, though. It's a blessing and gift to know where you're going. And to be able to discern God's will in it, better still.

I guess I'm rambling like this because Nadine's pictures made me think of Keysha's lovely benediction. All the bad things--the weights pinning me to the ground--she assured me are behind me, and life, brand spankin' new and shining, is spread out before me.

I think I know where I'm going to. I'm loving the things God is showing me.

Now, I still have my struggles. Becoming new, rediscovering my life, whatever I want to call my great awakening, comes with challenges. Something has to happen to the old me, and things are indeed happening. I'm making adjustments, body, soul and spirit, but I can face the difficulties with courage, trusting God to know the blueprint of who I truly am, and to mold and make me, with His own hands, into this very beautiful soul.

And He'll do the same to you.

“We are his workmanship created in Christ Jesus to do good works which he has preordained for us to walk in.” Eph. 2:10.




Elysa said...

Smiling right now.

Diadem Jewels said...

Hi Miss Claudia, this is Gina's daughter, Lauren. She told me you have a blog, so I searched and found you! I hope you don't mind that I'm stalkin...I mean FOLLOWING you :)

Marti said...

Not sure why I never saw this before.
But I love your heart as I love you.

And I'm so grateful He makes all things new.