Thursday, May 08, 2008

A Visit from the Unholy Ghost

Jane Kenyon had it right:

Coarse, mean, you'll put your feet
on the coffee table, lean back,
and turn me into someone who can't
take the trouble to speak; someone
who can't sleep, or who does nothing
but sleep; can't read, or call
for an appointment for help.


There is nothing I can do
against your coming.
When I awake, I am still with thee.


I am grateful that I understand God--the HOLY Ghost--is still with me too, and He is greater than depression. That doesn't mean I don't feel the unpleasant talons of this unwanted visitor clawing at my poor, battered brain. I feel it, until I don't feel anything.

I am completely shocked at the shell I've become in such a short time. I'll return when I can. Until then I rely on your kind prayers.

love,
mair francis

9 comments:

nedras said...

Oh, Precious. You've been there for so many of us, and you've been there for me when I was a true leech. I'll pray for you.

I don't mean to only come around during troublesome times. Folks love you (and that includes me) even when the going is good.

I'm glad you know that God is greater.

When someone will hug you, let them.

Mair, I noticed your Twitter. You know I'm not techno-equipped, but I pray that you can take a break. Be still if you can.

I'm too scared to say anything else, so I'll stop here.

Concerned, but prayerful and hopeful, Nedra

Anonymous said...

oh. my. gosh. i have been RACKED by depression the last week or so. misery loves company, so here i am, raising a toast to us (of really bad jug wine-- sorry).

tomorrow night tim and i are gigging my niece's senior prom. i'm hoping to drum my blues away, so i'll try to drum yours, too.

may Abba enfold us both.

xo,
"bernadette"

Robin said...

{{hugs}} and wish I could bring you a loaf of homemade sourdough bread and chicken stew...

and a Coca-Cola...

'cause those things don't drive away the black dog, but they sure taste good goin' down.

Praying for you, beautiful....

Christi Bowman said...

Worried about YOU Claudia...i called last night...I noticed you were my missing friend on Facebook...what's up? Call me back...I left you my number!! :)

wilsonian said...

Hang on, luvy.
Hang on.
Hang on.
Hang on.

Joni said...

Oh, Holy Spirit of God, breathe refreshing breezes across the heart, soul, and mind of our dear Claudia. May Your peace and grace be hers in abundance.

Hugs, hugs, hugs...

Kathy Rainwater said...

Mair - please know that we all really do love you, not for what you do for us (for I fear you give and give to any of us who ask - being the incarnate Christ!), but for who you, in your tender Ragamuffin state are.

It's so okay that you need to pull back...

I, too, am scared to say a wrong word, but know that I love you.

Coffee Bean said...

Dear Mair,

I am a personal friend of Elysa's and it is through her that I was introduced to your blog. I don't know you or the details but I know the battle. I am praying for you.

Duncan's Dog Blog said...

I am a first time visitor to your blog. I started The Exorsistah today and finished it tonight. I LOVED it.

Before I tell you how much I appreciated the story, let me first say that whatever is troubling you, GOD is greater. You have been blessed with the gift of story- and you helped me escape all the stress and troubles I felt today. Thank you- for using the gift that God has blessed you with. If you feel weak or scared, remember the passion and strength that you gave your character Emme. God will never give you more than you can handle, and I will pray that you find rest in His promise.

Your book was amazing. I became emotional on the last page, happy for love and sad that the story was over. I will share this book with my students- they will love it too. I will wait anxiously for book 2, if it is to be written.

Take care.
Sincerely,
Beth Duncan